How to make your partner hate hiking

We all come across a situation where we meet a person who later becomes our life partner. And of course, we want to draw them into our world and make them share our interests. This is especially true for hikers who want to go hiking with their partner. But this is a very delicate issue. You need to approach this matter with care and consideration to make your partner fall in love with mountains and stop being afraid of them, just like you. That is why do not follow the tips below.

• Choose a difficult direction for the first hike. For example, climbing the Northern peak of Aragats. In no case should you start with simple routes such as Mount Gutanasar. Let them experience the whole bouquet of sunstroke, dehydration, mountain sickness and corns on their feet on the very first day.

• Be sure to tell them about your future plans: Elbrus, Kazbek, maybe even some seven-thousander. Tell them how difficult and, most importantly, dangerous it is. Remember to mention mortality statistics. Girls love mathematicians.
• Invite your girlfriend to a movie night party. She will come in a beautiful evening dress, and you will just put on hiking boots, take an ice axe and start watching the movie. After all, you met for a movie screening, right? So what movie to watch? Right! Be sure to select either “Everest” or “The Nordwand”. Let your girlfriend cover her face from fear, then you will calm her down, like a real gentleman. At the end, be sure to tell her that you are also planning to climb those mountains.
• Invite your partner to a meeting with your friends. Then talk with friends about mountains, hiking gear and equipment all night long. The more unclear terms you use, the better. Don’t let your partner understand anything so they will feel how much they need to learn. Be sure to tell about your past campaigns: how you got lost in the fog, how you all drank together in a tent, how you stayed in the house of villagers, and so on. Let your partner feel how strong your friendship is and how much they will need to work on themselves to deserve you.

• If your boyfriend doesn’t have any hiking experience, then take him with you on the longest and most difficult hike. Let him creep wearily after you, while you are jumping over the stones. Go ahead and thereby show him how strong you are. Nothing motivates the man like a trampled pride.
• Call your partner for a morning run, early in the morning… Very early – at 6 am. Let her see what a healthy lifestyle you lead. From the very beginning, start torturing your partner with a long and boring exercise, and then be sure to start explaining the rules of proper running in detail and tell her about the great role of cardio training, the difference between aerobic and anaerobic exercises. Continue this as long as your sweating partner will freeze standing at her place. If she says that she goes to the gym with friends, be sure to start making fun of them, because real athletes train on the street, right?

• If your partner starts to choke during a workout, in no case do not stop and do not give her the opportunity to relax. On the contrary, keep repeating: “Don’t stop, move on!” It is advisable to say it in a loud and boorish way, so that your partner feels worthless. There is no need to develop a correct, balanced training plan that matches the physical condition of your partner. Train according to your level. If she loves you, then she will strive to reach your level.

If your partner nevertheless will love hiking, and one day asks you to go camping together with an overnight stay, or starts talking about high mountains such as Ararat, Kazbek and Sabalan, then arrogantly give your answer: “You can’t overcome!”. After all, mountains are only for special ones.

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